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Gwen’s Little Spot

The mental scribblings and daily doings of one transgender woman, writer, and activist, with content somehow deemed good enough to win a 2004 “Queery“ award.

Monday, April 30, 2007

Posted: 11:12:00 AM
Give the splurge time to work

It was a nice, if largely uneventful weekend. We did get our State refund this past week, which meant being able to “splurge” — if just a bit.

• My digital camera was replaced, with yet another Best Buy closeout: a Canon PowerShot A620 replaces my now-defunct Canon PowerShot A60. I did not expect a major difference, but the level of detail is remarkably different between 2 Mega Pixels, and 7.1 Mega Pixels. I wish I had this for those old insect shots of mine. One may hope this will mean more photos here, though its first uses have been with photosourcing for in-world textures.

• Bon’s birthday gift was secured: a low-end but nice Weber Grill now resides at La Casa, and got its first use last evening, with a steak and veggie meal made entirely on the barbie. Yet another reason why we’ll have to have some sort of summer shin-dig this year, I think.

The rest of the weekend, by and large, was spent in “recover” mode. I could have sworn I just recently took a week off, yet I’m right back to weekend exhaustion. This — and me — gets old fast.


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Posted: 10:51:00 AM
The cow says... Meh!

I’m attempting to just smile and trudge though, but really I’m trying to figure out how long I can possibly stand this.

C’mon résumés, do your trick!


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Friday, April 27, 2007

Posted: 7:12:00 AM
Friday Links For You!

A couple quick Friday links. I had more that I thought I e-mailed to myself ’ but apparently not!

This well-intended letter to the editor was supposed to be an asshat, but it turns out the letter writer’s tongue was firmly placed in cheek. In which case, I give it two snaps up and an attaboy!

Now then, some quick fun

Can you predict what’s inside?
Hindsight, of course, is always 20/20
Obviously from a co-worker of mine
I expected a bigger fight over this

And that’s it. Enjoy the weekend!


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Thursday, April 26, 2007

Posted: 9:35:00 AM
Wait, this is good, right?

The HR manager at The Summer Temp Job That Laid Me Off approached me today, asking if I was interested in benefits and such. She's intending to see me become a full employee. Yikes.

Meanwhile, TSTJTLMO made me sick yesterday, and I stayed home thanks to a hell of a migraine. The workload increased on Tuesday, with the current project made even more unwieldy. To be honest, I don’t know if I want to see it through, given the particulars of the work involved in what they want. I’m still doing it, though, but — ick.

On the plus side, a very dear friend of mine is using a contact of theirs (well, their husband, not just a contact) to see how I can get into contract writing. That could well be a better thing for me to be doing.


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Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Posted: 11:39:00 AM
Odds and sods

A little more info dumping.

• I broke my digital camera the other day. Slipped out of my hands while shooting, and knocked the lens out of alignment. It still takes photos, but they are all fuzzy. This was most unfortunate, as I could really use it right about now to collect real-world textures for the aforementioned project.

• I was able to retrieve the most recent photos from it, though. I still need to put a couple up here, too. At least the ones with Robbie the Robot, no?

• The iTunes Music Store has been makin my day lately, thanks in part to a gift card I was given recently (thanks!). Of note are tracks like “Soul Finger” by the Bar-Kays, “Don’t Let’s Start” by TMBG, and fine selections from the Grindhouse Soundtrack like “Chick Habit” by April March.

• Somewhere in this office, I found an old Swingline stapler. It’s red. I keep it on our around whatever desk I happen to be using at the time. Those who get it will laugh, those who don’t (which I suspect is much of the staff) will not.


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Posted: 10:25:00 AM
On the other, other hand

I try to limit the Second Life talk, because I know the sort of reactions I get from some when I do — and quite frankly, I find it easier to simply not say anything, than say what I want and have to deal with some of the commentary. I’ve recently been able to embark on an ambitious project, however, and simply must gush a little bit.

In the last post, I mentioned the lack of a creative outlet, so I’m glad to have the space in there to do something much more enjoyable. Aside from the obvious role play possibilities, one can create items, even shape the land that everyone else may enjoy.

While I do have a small shop (actually a couple different mall booths), as well as do personal building on my own land in-world, I have recently been allowed to embark on my most ambitious work. I’m helping to put together an entire region (a 256m x 256m area of land hosted on a simulator).

I’m not working on it all, granted, and am part of a three person creative team, but a lot of freedom is being afforded to simply “make cool stuff.” I'm sure that some of those on my friends’ list who do build on SL (I’m pointing at you, Jenn) know how much fun it can be in the first place to build, but having both the ability to really shape this rather sizable area (from terrain tools on up!) and the “green light” to bring such things to life is really quite nice indeed.

It beats re-editing Microsoft Excel files any day.


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Posted: 10:08:00 AM
One of my turns

Today is just one of those days when I simply do not want to be here at the summer temp job that laid me off. The work is in hurry up and wait mode, and I don’t prefer either: just give me a steady stream, and I’m happy. Or, happier. I’ve not slept well, which just adds to it.

It’s not that I’m adverse to working, mind you. It is largely because this is not at all a good fit for me. I know enough about myself that I excel where I am allowed to be creative, where I can come up with unique solutions (that sounds like résumé hyperbole, but it really is true), where I can lead, and so on. I get precious little of all of these here. At this point, aside from having a friend here on staff, the only thing that keeps me coming is the paycheck — and if I did not simply need that in order to do all those good things like eating and paying rent, that wouldn’t be a motivator. I’m not typically cash-motivated, but right now I quite simply need the cash.

Very quickly, though, the cons of coming to this workplace are outweighing even that pro. There are other things which I do not feel comfortable discussing in a public forum that only add to my discontent.

I wonder, sometimes, if I’d feel different if they had brought me on-board during or after Summer '06. I did not like the job much then, but at least I felt like there might be something for me here. Yet now I know that I’m here in the capacity I am because, frankly, they can get away with paying me without benefits and sick/vacation pay, and it is that much easier for them to say “oops, we’re done now.”

I’ve got other résumés out there, and I’m hoping I’ll hook something else soon.

I simply have to.


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Thursday, April 19, 2007

Posted: 3:23:00 PM
Recaps and retreads

So I took last week off from the Summer temp job I was laid off from. Here’s the highlights and lowlights.

•Saw Grindhouse, and liked it. I preferred the Tarantino offering to the Rodriguez, but both were good. Well, good in a schlocky sort of way, The faux trailers are also great.

Bummed around San Francisco for about the first time in a year. Mostly stuck to the area around the Emporium and the Meteron (where we watched the aforementioned flick). Hit up the Sanrio store. Enjoyed the geeky comic-book-and-manga store in the Metreon. Took pictures with Robbie the Robot, which I will have to put here sometime soon.

•Took care of a lot of long-delayed house cleaning. That’s always good for a pick-me-up..

•Tendered a resume or two.

•Participated in a wedding in Second Life.

•Got a few of my affairs in order: the long, weird hours with this job mean less time to do the things I care about. I still need another week or two to really get on top of things, but wishes and horses, I suppose.

•Did our taxes. Owed to Federal, got back from State.

•Got a lot of time with Bon. Our schedules have not been exactly compatible, meaning little time to just be together. It was nice to get that time.

•Took some time to reflect on myself, where I’ve been, and where I might be going. Still so much to do in that vein.

•Lost a friend. In spite of everything, I will miss you — but I think we knew some time ago that we might reach this day.

Back at work today. Meh.


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Friday, April 06, 2007

Posted: 7:17:00 AM
Friday time

Finally, it’s the end of this week. It’s been a particularly rough one for me. Then again, isn’t that about what I should expect by now?

Here’s this week’s asshats: these fine people, worried that Prince’s Super Bowl antics might rob peoples’ manhood. It makes me wonder: would Britney Spears cause male pattern baldness?

And now, fun stuff.

More fun webcomics for your reading enjoyment!
“I’m the Doctor...” — Who’s singing?
He works in my company’s Tattooine branch now
Fun with Flickr!
Is it good or bad that I’ve seen nearly every one of these?
The world of the future, 1901
Nifty pictures, now with caffeine!

Enjoy the weekend, all.


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Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Posted: 10:43:00 AM
“We’re gonna need to go ahead and move you downstairs into storage B”

Next week, they’re moving my workstation again. Another upgrade: semi-private, and with an exterior view.

For a moment, it was actually going to be a private office, until they discovered it was already spoken for.

I’m still officially laid off.

This truly is surreal.


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Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Posted: 7:34:00 AM
The tingle means it's working!

Yes, the little party for Christine’s birthday down at the Conga Lounge was quite a bit of fun. Unfortunately, as often happens on nights like this, I am now fighting a cold and nursing a headache that started on Sunday.

Why can’t I get a hangover like “normal” people?


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All text copyright © Gwen Smith, not for republication without permission.